Have some uncensored truths:
I've suffered six mental disorders in the last 3 years: body dysmorphic disorder, anorexia, bulimia, depression, binge eating disorder, and borderline personality disorder. Anxiety/social anxiety also fits somewhere in there. I've never been hospitalised and if it wasn't for my family then I would be a danger to myself. Right now I'm forcing recovery because I haven't got a choice. As suicidal as I may be, I can't allow it to be an option because my family don't deserve it so I have to live.
Why am I telling you this now, right at the beginning?
Because it can only get worse from here. Pessimistic, I know, but if you were me then you'd know it's more realistic than pessimistic. Also, from your pov as the reader, it can only get worse. Everything you're reading here is my life, it's my past and rarely, my present. Sometimes I may post fears of the future but whatever it is, you're getting to walk the red carpet into my mind and seeing it's bare-naked self for what it is.
Why am I doing this?
Purely because a lot of people on various sites have been asking me to do this for quite a while. I think it's actually been about six months since I got the first requests from a lot of Redditors, someone even gave me gold (non-Redditors, this is Reddit reference!) for one of my comments regarding my job! I guess I've just never been ready to confront everything until now. Also, another reason for doing this is that I've recently started studying Psychology at uni so I believe it would be interesting to look back on my mind when I'm better educated. For the most part, this blog is for everyone who's ever asked for it or asked for my story. Clearly a lot of people find my life interesting, I don't know if it actually is interesting because it's just my life to me and to me my life doesn't feel real. But it's here. Whatever is here is 100% my experiences, thoughts, feelings, whathaveyou. I will be skipping on some information just because I'd like to maintain my anonymity and don't want those closest to me finding me so, yeah, there you go.
What can you (my readers) expect to find on here?
All of the above and then some. I'm a huge Redditor and Pinterest user and health/fitness freak and music lover and horrible artist (especially when I'm bored out of my head in my lectures!) and vain mother fucker. Expect things from most of these corners of my life as well as more. I can't tell you exactly what you'll find here because I like variety and I like change. I can't just write about my life as "The Borderline Courtesan" because I'd get bored. You'll find a lot of memes/gifs and a lot of things I personally find interesting and things I think you guys will find interesting. Expect some self-help advice because I'm a avid advice giver! Expect a lot of rambling and story telling. I don't know. Expect the world and his wife, I guess.
Oh, also, something significant that I will be posting are FAQ posts so look out for these. I will be posting questions I've had in the past and if anyone reading on here would like to ask me a question then head over to my contact page and simply email me! I'll post an answer asap. However, if you'd like me to keep it private and not post the question and my answer then that's cool, I'm happy to just reply to you via email. In saying this, I should mention that if I believe others might be asking the same question (or if others have asked the same question!) then I will post it on here but I'll let you know first. Stupid messages will either get deleted or posted on here for a laugh!"
Merry reading to you all, and fare thee well!
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